The Writing Prompts

Last night, at the 1st annual interactive, reflective, celebratory Mother's Day event entitled Mothering: The Act Of, a number of women participated in our blog-based conversation about what mothering means, how it feels and what it does.

(Scroll down to read the varied voices...)

Now, we invite you to participate, too.
Listed below are the prompts that we made available last night.
Won't you consider responding to one or more of these, in our comments section?
We'll then take the text from those comments and give them their own post, growing the blog and spreading the word.

(Please feel free to stay anonymous or to identify yourself with descriptives: “Mother of 3 Boys” or “Single Mom” or “Pregnant Mama” or “Missing my Mother”. You get the idea...)

Here goes:

The Metaphor Post
Can you compare mothering to an ocean, a window, a wound? The sky, the earth, a hot air balloon? Start your piece with “Mothering is like….” and let your poetic imagination run wild.

The Memory Post
What is one of your keenest memories (positive or negative) about being mothered as a child?
Or, what is one of your keenest memories of mothering your own children?

The Post of Hope
The earliest celebration of Mother’s Day in the U.S. was founded in mothers coming together to proclaim the desire for peace on earth. What do you wish for the future? The future for your children, you as a mother, the planet?

The Dear Daughter, Son or Mother Post
Sometimes there is no easier way to speak your mind than in the form of a letter – especially one that won’t get sent. Who will you write to? What would you like to say?

mercy and grace

Being a mother sans mother since the teen years. I absorbed and inherited among many other things passion and a short fuse. Through experience and some therapy I now know what I neeed to mother sanely and mindfully: mercy and grace.

thankful for the present

Mom, it is very special that you have apologized to me for past hurts. I am working towards forgiveness. I completely accept it when you say you did the best you could, and I am sorry you "burnt out on parenting." My hope is that you can at some point, through our current evolving relationship, see how those motherless days influenced and shaped me as much as all the good times. And I do remember the good times. But giving you the blanket "Oh, it's OK," when you apologize would be a disservice to the parts of me that formed in a different way than they would have if there would have been someone I knew that I could count on no matter what. I think I am well on the road to forgiveness, because I have compassion for your experience, I am not angry, and I am not afraid to try out these new ways of talking to you about it all. I am very grateful for this time we have together as adults.

What are you soothing?

For yourself when you are parenting your own children?
Ponder it. I am.

happy day to me!

I know without question that being a mom is my single greatest accomplishment.
I have come to realize...possibly just earlier today that what I want for my child is to be a better person than I could ever be. that is the trickiest of balancing acts. to love and nurture and guide and direct and play and laugh and honor the individual that is your child. honoring your child for who he is and who he will be.

I've been blessed with three best friends in my lifetime, and I'd like to honor one kick-ass mom and friend, who's like a sister to me.
You became a mother unexpectedly, and much sooner than you ever planned. At your high school reunion, you shocked your former schoolmates by transforming in five short years from Dance Team Captain to mother of four! You turned out four beautiful, brilliant free spirits without so much as a period in between in the same amount of time it took your peers to grab a Bachelor's. I honor you, for making a marvelous choice--for making a marvelous family. You could have easily been selfish, but you gave each of your daughters a sister and each of your sons a brother for their sake. It took me years to achieve the maturity to even decide to become a mother, but you make it look so easy. Homeroom mom, Team mom, and Troop Leader--your youthful energy inspires me. You haven't had it as easy as me; you scraped by and provided everything those babies needed. When you wanted to take a family vacation even though you were "poor", as you self-proclaimed without shame, you sacrificed and used your talents and resourcefulness to make it happen. Most of all, I humbly thank you for teaching me to throw out the Parenting Magazines, skip the laundry, and just have fun with my kids. Thanks for teaching me that it's okay to enjoy myself once in a while. You are a great mom and friend, and I treasure you!

my sweet mama

I feel so incredibly lucky to be my mother's daughter. she is infinitely kind as well as wise and warm. she is truly a generous soul and an amazing woman. how fortunate I am to have a mom that is compassionate by nature. love that woman for all she is and all she is not!
so appreciative that we have a connection today that feels safe and balanced.
thank you mom for allowing me to be me while instilling a little of you into my psyche.

Parenting - the open wound

Whether I look back to my own childhood and wish mothering would have been different or look at my children and wish at times my mothering was different, more patient, more enlightened, I now know - just a little bit - that I cannot grow and my children cannot grow with out suffering in some form. And this has made the most sense to me than any other advice. Instead of asking why did she leave me?... I know I am a good mother, a great mother because she did.

loving you more today mom

When you were dying and I was holding your hand, you asked me to talk about all the good memories I had from our life together. I froze. I hadn't thought forward. I talked about the days when i was little. For some reason that came most easily. What I forgot to share and fill your head with was how much I loved all the recent moments of intimacy. I forgot to tell you that I searched for things to talk about in our car rides, no matter how short, because I enjoyed our conversations. I forgot to tell you how much I would miss calling you to ask for your advice. I forgot to tell you that even though we had our share of yelling, screaming fights, I thought you were the best mom ever. I forgot to tell you that there is very little I want to do differently, because I feel like I was mothered so well. 6 years later, after your death, I still catch myself thinking - I should call mother and tell her.....

Dear Mom,
Some moment, maybe soon I'll be able to share my love with you. Today still there's blockage. The love is inching in a good direction. I protect myself. It still doesn't always feel so good. I'm finding it though with my girlfriends. I think that's maybe where it could spill over from. I have hope.
Love,
A daughter who's coming around and lettin' go of a troubled past.

my mom, the joker

My mom gave me a sense of humor. She and I would practically wet our pants over mis-used, in appropriately used, mis-pronounced words. One time I was talking on the phone to a mechanic, asking questions, getting information about my car, which was in the shop. Mom was in the same room. I ended the conversation saying "I'll get right back on you with that" (meaning to say, of course, " I'll get right back to you about that". She was dying, couldn't even speak, she was laughing so hard. And there's no way you can't laugh when that happens. I can still get those hard, can't-stop giggles around her, even though we actually have a lot of heavy baggage.

A Non Mom

Okay friends, although my loins have not birthed a baby I have contributed greatly to the beauty of our planet by simply loving. That's mothering right? My career allows me to peer into the eyes of young ones on a daily basis and I get to feed off of them, their love, the love they have received from their moms, or even their non moms. So, that is what I am, a proud non mom to give to our universe with my mothering skills. The beauty is that when I do become a mom I will be a rock star mom because of all the examples set before me. Thank you to all of you, my mom, my moms mom, her mom. And the non moms.

Launching the blog

Mother's Day.

I remember bringing my mother cheap perfume and delivering slightly chaotic breakfasts in bed. Homemade cards cut from construction paper. Coupons for car washes and kisses and making the beds without whining.

Today, I got similar sorts of things and celebrated in similiar ways -- at my own house, with my own daughters.

Mother's Day.

It is a dear and funny and archtypal day... but it does not define mothering.

Then again, what does?

On Mother's Day 2008, a visionary pair of moms in Austin, Texas, invited all of the rest of us to gather, reflect and celebrate all that mothering means and mothering does.

The event?
Mothering: The Act Of

The venue?
The United States Arts Authority

The mothers?
You and me

And this, my friends, is the blog.
Created during the event, alongside embroidery, spoken word, altar building and collage art.

Created, in part, to define mothering. In part.
Because there is no other way.

Enjoy the posts.